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Comedy Freddy unveils the punchline

This morning that very clever Geordie Freddy Shepherd claimed Newcastle's youth setup rivalled that of Manchester United's from the early 90's,

'We will have eight of our academy kids in our team and substitutes tonight - Steven Taylor, Peter Ramage, Paul Huntington, Matty Pattison, David Edgar, Alan O'Brien, Andy Carroll and James Troisi,' boasted Fat Fred.

'That's 50 per cent - and it becomes nearly 60 per cent if you include our goalkeeper Steve Harper, who also came through the ranks.

'Even when Manchester United were bringing the likes of the Neville brothers, Ryan Giggs, David Beckham and Paul Scholes through, they did not have the numbers we have here at the moment,' the rotund one beamed.

The every same evening, his sparkling youth side shone as much as a turd in a dark alley during Greenland's winter months:

FA Cup 3rd round result:
Newcastle 1 - Birmingham City of The Championship 5.


They do always say that the secret of comedy is timing. Freddy, that was indeed a masterclass.

We look forward in anticipation to his next chortle-inducing media comments.


Disclaimer: As a rule, I tend not to mock and take cheap digs at our beloved neighbours, due to our often less-favourable position, but make no apologies for tonight's slip-up.




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The Journalist

Writer:  Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Wednesday January 17 2007

Time: 10:32PM

Your Comments (oldest first)

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Anyone would think that you didn't Newcastle.
miked_joker
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19/01/2007 23:54:00

Be a good job when Fat Freddie leaves football for good, or would you prefer he stays :-)
col8
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22/01/2007 03:57:00

Better than Bates at Leeds, he wants the rearranged game with Birmingham played with only those players available to Brum when game was cancelled. PMSL
col8
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23/01/2007 11:27:00

Oh well if you field a sub standard team of youth and reserves you get beat. Sad that the FA Cup is following the likes of the Muppet Cup and with an English manager in charge. It really cheapens the FA Cup - shame on Newcastle for their part in the downgrading of a once fine tournament.
pompeygray
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24/01/2007 12:47:00

 

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